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Thread: Election Alternatives (Yes, this belongs here!)

  1. #1

    Default Election Alternatives (Yes, this belongs here!)

    For those who find neither major party candidates viable, may I suggest the following alternatives:

    http://www.weirduniverse.net/

    Gene Amondson, Prohibition Party
    Amondson is running on a single issue: bringing back prohibition. He describes prohibition as "America's Best Years."

    Donald K. Allen, Independent
    One of the few candidates to have a position on puppy mills: "As President, I would appoint a secretary of agriculture that would effectively shut down puppy mills through true enforcement of existing law and national educational exposure of this despicable business. Instead of working from the bottom up, I would effectively mandate the dismantling of commercial interstate puppy trade from the top. This would be a no- or low-priority issue for any other candidate."

    Bruce Bongardt, The Proudican Party
    Bongardt describes himself as "a 42 year old middleclass creative problem-solving Mechanical Design Engineer." He describes the Proudican Party as "a new, self-started party focused on sustaining US Democracy principles through an independent platform of boldly aggressive technology-based prolutions (progressive solutions)." Some of his "prolutions" include expanding the standard week to 9 days and transitioning the currency to e-money.

    James Harlin Carter, The Real Food Party
    "The Real Food Party seeks to revise existing regulations to allow the sale of non-pasteurized milk and other 'food that is helpful.'" Carter has conceded that he's not going to win the 2008 election. Therefore, he's not going to participate in any debates and has no plans to raise any money.

    Terry Lee "Tee" Barkdull, Unaffiliated
    Barkdull's platform: "IT'S TIME WE ALL TAKE A STAND AGAINST THIS DICTATORSHIP GOVERNMENT THAT IS OUT OF CONTROL!! THESE SILVER SPOON BASTARDS AND BITCHES, CAN NOT CONTINUE TO RUN AMERICA ANYMORE." (Unfortunately, Barkdull has withdrawn his candidacy for the 2008 election.)

    Matthew Borman, The American Party
    Borman writes: "I am Matthew Borman. I am a 36 year old, who since the age of 14, had to work in order to survive. From the age that I was old enough to recognize government; the excitement about the politician, the writing of new law or the formation of government social program has eluded me. I am a simple working man. The people who seem so int rested in Governing my life have caused more hurt than help with their years of law making."
    Borman has many positions, but apparently improving spelling and grammar is not one of them.

    Jeff Boss, The Independent Party
    Boss is going for the conspiracy theorist vote: "My Goal is to Save America, and make it a democracy again. I witnessed a person high up in the NSA planning the 9/11 attack. They were talking about helping Ramsi Yousef (responsible for the 93 bombing at the World Trade Center) call his uncle Kolid Sheik Mohammed (considered the mastermind of the 911 attack) from the NSA secret prison in Alexandria, VA, and they were talking about flying planes into buildings."

    John Taylor Bowles, National Socialist Order of America
    Going for the Nazi vote. From Wikipedia: "Bowles runs his campaign out of the "Redneck Shop" in Laurens, South Carolina, which features Nazi, Confederate States of America and KKK paraphernalia. As of March 2008, Bowles is the only listed individual contributor to his campaign." (Bowles suffered a heart attack in July, so he's off the ticket.)

    R.I.P. Cyrano and Roxanne.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Election Alternatives (Yes, this belongs here!)

    why isn't this on the politics thread.
    "When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in a confederacy against him."

  3. #3

    Default Re: Election Alternatives (Yes, this belongs here!)

    I am now voting for Bruce Bongardt, The Proudican Party, I always wanted to 9 day work weeks.

    Should be in the political threads though

  4. #4

    Default Re: Election Alternatives (Yes, this belongs here!)

    We should all drink to Gene Amondson's platform!
    "Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!?

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