April 05. 2008 10:18PM
Gable tries to offer support to survivors
Dan Gable Former Iowa head coach
Either you conquer adversity,
Dan Gable says, or it conquers you.
"There's only one option," Gable said. "The other is not an option in my book."
Trite? Simplistic? Not if you've lived it and spent your life trying to persuade others that being the conqueror is the only way to go.
But the wrestling icon isn't always talking about his sport, or sports in general. Sometimes he's talking about coming back from something quite a bit tougher than ordinary adversity.
There's always been far more to Gable than meets the eye. He'll be sharing an important part of himself Friday night at Elmcrest Country Club when he is the featured the speaker at the Horizons Homicide Survivors' Support Program. As a prelude to National Crime Victims' Rights Week April 13-19, Cedar Rapids non-profit family services organization Horizons (398-3943) is holding a dinner program with Gable Friday and a 5K race/walk at Marion's Thomas Park Saturday at 9 a.m.
Gable has done a lot of public speaking in his adult life, a lot of motivational speaking. But this is a somewhat different situation for him. However, the subject of homicide survivors speaks directly to who he is and what he became.
He was 15 years old and on a fishing trip with his parents Memorial Day weekend in 1964. His 19-year-old sister and only sibling, Diane, was sexually assaulted and murdered in the Gable family home in Waterloo while Mack and Katie Gable and their son, Dan, were away. On the way home, Dan told his dad he suspected Tom Kyle, a 16-year-old who had told Dan about his desires for Diane, was the killer. He was, and Kyle was sentenced to life in prison.
He believes he could have prevented his sister's death. "That will never go away," he said. "Yet in my heart, I can handle it."
It happened more than 43 years ago. It truly never goes away. The Olympic gold medalist and most successful collegiate coach in wrestling history, Gable, 59, has carried the memory of his sister's murder with him.
"It's still with me and never will stop," Gable said, "unless I lose my mental capacity to feel it. It helps me make better decisions on a daily basis and for long-range planning, especially for my family. I ended up having four daughters, and they were probably in shock at some of the stuff I've done. I just didn't want something to go by that I could have prevented."
Gable often has said that his sister's death made him throw himself into wrestling, made him more of a "horse with blinders" regarding the sport.
"It was to keep my family together more than anything," he said. "It was a plan to keep my family from disintegrating, and wrestling was a route I could use to do that."
But young Gable didn't necessarily put the whole world on his shoulders. He freely admits he got help in high school from his wrestling coaches and his guidance counselor.
"Stability helps a lot," he said, "and I think you have to have some faith in everything you do. A lot of things drive me."
Wherever you are, someone is probably trying to cope with the effects of a tragedy. In Iowa City, the community where Gable lives and works for the University of Iowa Athletics Department, a murder/suicide recently ended the lives of an entire six-member family. Many in the city are hurting because of it.
"Somehow the people associated with the situation have to work through it," Gable said. "I mean, they have to work through it. I'm talking about not letting it drain you every day of your life or holding a person from being the best they could be."
Somehow — and the evidence is pretty powerful given his amazing successes and the large number of people he has coached and advised — Gable refused to let his sister's murder destroy him or his family. He continually hopes to help others in similar situations feel likewise.
"Adversity touches everybody sooner or later," he said. "When it does, we're all in need of good guidance. My role Friday, if I can help one kid there go on to be a little bit better, I've done my job. Hopefully, that will happen."
n Contact the writer: (319) 362-6135 or
mike.hlas@gazettecommunications.com. Read Mike Hlas' "The Hlog" at
www.gazetteonline.com.
Gable tries to offer support to survivors 
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